Of Import: Mario's Love Hotel

Video game giant Nintendo got its start decades before such things existed, producing decks of playing cards and conventional toys, and, though this is rarely mentioned in the official histories, operating a chain of "love hotels" in Japan, with rooms rented by the hour.

Nintendo even released this rare and highly collectible game for the 8-bit Famicom, honoring the seedier side of Mario's corporate roots; it was, for obvious reasons, never released for the US Nintendo Entertainment System:

Mario has to keep the condom machines stocked:

And keep the pay-per-view porn operating by shooing the ducks off the closed-circuit television lines:

And change the sheets between customers so the rooms can be rented out again.  And keep Donkey Kong the bouncer happy so he'll roust belligerent customers and drunken prostitutes.  And make sure Pauline and Princess Peach and Stanley the Bug Man don't find out about each other.


And yes, it is April 1st, 2011.