Anything and Everything About This Campaign Is Great!

Culture Brain's ads in the late 8-bit era were always entertaining to read, because the company assumed its Japanese ads would work more or less as-is in the West.  Their layouts always gave the impression that the copy had been translated from the original Japanese just barely in time to hit the presses.

In 1990, they sponsored a contest to promote their NES game Kung-Fu Heroes:

This is actually an improvement over the early Culture Brain translations -- most of the ad is cleanly worded and readable, but whenever the copy gets excited, it gets a little weird.  Specifically...

The contest is inclusive:

A Big Chance for the Whole Family! 


The tournament is not only for the game maniacs but for any family members.

There are in-store freebies to be had, if you can find them:

STEP 1 GIVE AWAYS: The limited edition of the Kung-Fu Heroes board games and buttons will be given away at the participating retail stores.

There are, of course, legal and procedural disclaimers:

The finals will be performed by the blocks.


Don't reach the 100 million mark.  The highest score you can get with this game is 99,999,900.  If you go over it, the score will reset and start at 0, and the points you have gotten will be invalid.




Please no inquiries by phones.

With a nod to the hardcore fans:

You are the torchbearers of the video game culture which is to be transmitted to the next generation.

And a self-congratulatory bit of hyperbole:

Anything and everything about this campaign is great!

Yes.  Yes it is.

Though maybe for the wrong reasons.